Today I thought about quitting!! I do not like this position at all. the people are cool but the position blows! I sit here all day and feel totally useless. Who the heck wants to sit and do expenses all day? When I am not doing expenses I am surfing the net.
I'm not at all certain if I'm going to make it thru the summer working here. I hate that I have fifteen days and they include sick days. I love the fact that I make more money but I didn't sign up for being a slacky, I would much rather that be my choice then my reality of this job. lol..
I haven't been posting lately. I am not sure why but I have written but have kept the posts in draft mode. Why? don't know. I could be starting my novel, but I'm not sure what I want to write. I have 8 hours and five days a week to think about it, but because my mind is on veg mode all day I'm not kept on my toes too many minor distractions.
Maybe I'm just in a mood this week....
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Sunshine and Happiness
It's a great day. It may be cold and gloomy out to some but I see sunshine and blue skies! I had a great weekend!
What did I do you ask that made it so great? I have to admit that I didn't do anything special. I like to rest and rest I is what I did. I moved to the drum of my own beat this weekend. I ran my errands of course but I returned to the house early as though I never left. I lay around and watched DVDs all weekend. I don't go to the movies often so catching up on movies is a weekend past time of mine.
Winter is when lionesses like myself hibernate with our young. *smile* I even attempted to write on this blog once or twice, but I failed at that miserably. The text is still in draft. I was going to honor the Rev Dr MLK because it was the appropriate thing to do and I always acknowledge it with something enlightening. Then, I decided to get a snack and never returned to the computer. So much for enlightening MLK messages. I guess sitting in front of a computer on the weekend didn't appeal to me. I'll try again next weekend.
I had my mani and pedi done. The woman did a nice job but the polish ended up getting a smudge on one toe anyway. Don't you hate that? aaargh....I should have asked her to do the whole thing over but whatever, I'm the only one that will see them until summertime. My friend told me I might have a foot fetish because I hate feet so much. Eeew I doubt it.
I had my "three-month probationary review" today. It's just a one-sheet piece of paper that is ticked off by your one-up manager. What else could he say besides "she's the greatest"? He doesn't sit near me at all and he doesn't ask me to do anything for him. At best he may ask me to book travel and minor expenses, but nothing major. Remember I work for three execs and two analysts. Well one analyst now one dude just walked out one day and never returned. He did send an email a day later saying "this position wasn't a good fit for him". I knew he was up to something things were different on his desk and he was a bit different. I think this other Analyst is going to leave as well. A matter of time, he is probably in the middle of his interview process. *smile* I'll keep you posted.
I was supposed to go have a night on the town this weekend also, but that didn't happen either night. Oh wait, I did go out on Friday. I have to remind myself not to go out with that friend again. Why? I think I've graduated from that level of crazy, and so it's time to move forward. We went for drinks the drinks were average. I felt like I should have stayed home. I should have followed my first thought and that was to decline the invitation. Silly me. I could have had a better drink at home and listened to some good music while dancing in the mirror. hahaha Oh please I can let my hair down and be as goofy with the rest of em!
Sunday was great because I woke up with words at the tip of my tongue. I wrote more then I had in a long while. I was flowing so much I think my thoughts began to overlap. The phone was a minor distraction for a moment but I knew I had to press the pen to the paper and get my own thoughts out before my flow was interrupted in a major way. Needless to say I after awhile I couldn’t flow any longer, but it was cool. I meditated and took a nice refreshing nap. Everyday, when I arrive home I’ve been able to write like I use to in the past. Well, actually my flow is a little better then in the past. I’m in a wonderful place right now and I plan on staying for a minute to fan myself, pat my back a little and marinate in the good stuff. I’ll move on to an even grandeur place soon so “watch out now”! smile
I just heard from my friend overseas. I was a little concerned about her because she is a flight attendant and there was a crash on a competitor airline. I knew she was safe but there was something tugging at me prompting me to connect with her sooner then later. I emailed her and of course there is a bit of drama going on with her job. I hope everything works out for her because what happened sounds really childish. It just shows that people are people and drama is everywhere even across the seas. She has to go to the corporate offices so I’ll tell you the details and the outcome when everything is over.
The search is still on for a new place to call home. I think I might have to enlist the help of a broker or realtor. So many scams out there you have to be careful!
This is a three-day work week for me. I am off on Thursday, is there any more joy then to be off when everyone else is at work? NO!
I don't have my dictionary word today. I wasn't sure what I wanted to highlight in this blog. What emotion, what feeling. I guess it's the obvious....
hap·pi·ness
noun
1. state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy
2. emotions experienced when in a state of well-being
What did I do you ask that made it so great? I have to admit that I didn't do anything special. I like to rest and rest I is what I did. I moved to the drum of my own beat this weekend. I ran my errands of course but I returned to the house early as though I never left. I lay around and watched DVDs all weekend. I don't go to the movies often so catching up on movies is a weekend past time of mine.
Winter is when lionesses like myself hibernate with our young. *smile* I even attempted to write on this blog once or twice, but I failed at that miserably. The text is still in draft. I was going to honor the Rev Dr MLK because it was the appropriate thing to do and I always acknowledge it with something enlightening. Then, I decided to get a snack and never returned to the computer. So much for enlightening MLK messages. I guess sitting in front of a computer on the weekend didn't appeal to me. I'll try again next weekend.
I had my mani and pedi done. The woman did a nice job but the polish ended up getting a smudge on one toe anyway. Don't you hate that? aaargh....I should have asked her to do the whole thing over but whatever, I'm the only one that will see them until summertime. My friend told me I might have a foot fetish because I hate feet so much. Eeew I doubt it.
I had my "three-month probationary review" today. It's just a one-sheet piece of paper that is ticked off by your one-up manager. What else could he say besides "she's the greatest"? He doesn't sit near me at all and he doesn't ask me to do anything for him. At best he may ask me to book travel and minor expenses, but nothing major. Remember I work for three execs and two analysts. Well one analyst now one dude just walked out one day and never returned. He did send an email a day later saying "this position wasn't a good fit for him". I knew he was up to something things were different on his desk and he was a bit different. I think this other Analyst is going to leave as well. A matter of time, he is probably in the middle of his interview process. *smile* I'll keep you posted.
I was supposed to go have a night on the town this weekend also, but that didn't happen either night. Oh wait, I did go out on Friday. I have to remind myself not to go out with that friend again. Why? I think I've graduated from that level of crazy, and so it's time to move forward. We went for drinks the drinks were average. I felt like I should have stayed home. I should have followed my first thought and that was to decline the invitation. Silly me. I could have had a better drink at home and listened to some good music while dancing in the mirror. hahaha Oh please I can let my hair down and be as goofy with the rest of em!
Sunday was great because I woke up with words at the tip of my tongue. I wrote more then I had in a long while. I was flowing so much I think my thoughts began to overlap. The phone was a minor distraction for a moment but I knew I had to press the pen to the paper and get my own thoughts out before my flow was interrupted in a major way. Needless to say I after awhile I couldn’t flow any longer, but it was cool. I meditated and took a nice refreshing nap. Everyday, when I arrive home I’ve been able to write like I use to in the past. Well, actually my flow is a little better then in the past. I’m in a wonderful place right now and I plan on staying for a minute to fan myself, pat my back a little and marinate in the good stuff. I’ll move on to an even grandeur place soon so “watch out now”! smile
I just heard from my friend overseas. I was a little concerned about her because she is a flight attendant and there was a crash on a competitor airline. I knew she was safe but there was something tugging at me prompting me to connect with her sooner then later. I emailed her and of course there is a bit of drama going on with her job. I hope everything works out for her because what happened sounds really childish. It just shows that people are people and drama is everywhere even across the seas. She has to go to the corporate offices so I’ll tell you the details and the outcome when everything is over.
The search is still on for a new place to call home. I think I might have to enlist the help of a broker or realtor. So many scams out there you have to be careful!
This is a three-day work week for me. I am off on Thursday, is there any more joy then to be off when everyone else is at work? NO!
I don't have my dictionary word today. I wasn't sure what I wanted to highlight in this blog. What emotion, what feeling. I guess it's the obvious....
hap·pi·ness
noun
1. state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy
2. emotions experienced when in a state of well-being
Friday, January 18, 2008
FREESTYLE FRIDAY
I am happy it's Friday! It wouldn’t bother me one bit if three days out of our seven-day week were Friday followed by Saturday.
I don't have any special plans going on then again I hardly ever do. I wing it most times. I don't pleasure running around from here to there all the time.
I wake up and get my day started early even on the weekend. I'm up and out running errands on Saturday and back in the house most times by 11am unless I have to spread my errands out thru the course of the day. My daughter and I like to chill out from the hustle and bustle of city life sometime. We prefer the slower country pace in the city setting.
I'm up early by force of habit. I use to run and bike ride. I had this whole exercise thing going on until three years ago. What happened? Nothing. I just stopped.
Have you ever noticed how much happier or less aged city people look once they move south or to some city that is much slower pace then NYC? A lot more alcoholism probably but hey you can’t have everything. Lol..
Anyway, most times we as New Yorkers are always in some sort of rush. We rush to get our errands done, we rush to go to work during rush hours, we rush to eat lunch in the one hour allotted time; someone in the car behind us in a rush to get in front of you and just about everything else we do in our daily lives is rushed. We essentially end up rushing to grow old.
So my daughter and I live life on weekends as if we were at a resort for the weekend. We like to just hang out around the apartment and then for some reason in the early evening we are ready to do something, anything and that is what we do. We operate at our own pace, I cruise down the street doing the speed limit when I drive, a friend of mine says I sashay when I walk (unintentional of course I think I am walking fast :))
I slowed down because I enjoy life and as I get older I find no need to hurry up and get it done. I enjoy life with my daughter and I don't want things to rush past me in a blur. I wake up and leave my house during the work week in enough time to go shopping and have a sit down breakfast before I arrive to work if I wanted to do those things. Well I do shop in the am sometime.. heehee
I notice the small things around me because I am paying attention. I appreciate the little things because I take time to appreciate them. Sometime I'm a goalie sometime I'm a winger. I like to plan certain things those are my goalie tendencies however, there are instances I like to leave things adjustable and adaptable and that's where the winger part of me comes out. Are they good traits? These traits work for me right now I'm a recovering planner. I am more adaptable and plan more effectively. My plans are subjective so when necessary I will plan.
This weekend I’m planning on staying out of trouble. Maybe I will share next week if things went according to plan. The operative word being maybe... but did you just notice that I did plan? When necessary plan!
re·lax
–verb (used with object)
1.to make less tense, rigid, or firm; make lax
2.to become less tense, rigid, or firm.
3.to become less strict or severe; grow milder.
4.to reduce or stop work, effort, application, etc., esp. for the sake of rest or recreation
I don't have any special plans going on then again I hardly ever do. I wing it most times. I don't pleasure running around from here to there all the time.
I wake up and get my day started early even on the weekend. I'm up and out running errands on Saturday and back in the house most times by 11am unless I have to spread my errands out thru the course of the day. My daughter and I like to chill out from the hustle and bustle of city life sometime. We prefer the slower country pace in the city setting.
I'm up early by force of habit. I use to run and bike ride. I had this whole exercise thing going on until three years ago. What happened? Nothing. I just stopped.
Have you ever noticed how much happier or less aged city people look once they move south or to some city that is much slower pace then NYC? A lot more alcoholism probably but hey you can’t have everything. Lol..
Anyway, most times we as New Yorkers are always in some sort of rush. We rush to get our errands done, we rush to go to work during rush hours, we rush to eat lunch in the one hour allotted time; someone in the car behind us in a rush to get in front of you and just about everything else we do in our daily lives is rushed. We essentially end up rushing to grow old.
So my daughter and I live life on weekends as if we were at a resort for the weekend. We like to just hang out around the apartment and then for some reason in the early evening we are ready to do something, anything and that is what we do. We operate at our own pace, I cruise down the street doing the speed limit when I drive, a friend of mine says I sashay when I walk (unintentional of course I think I am walking fast :))
I slowed down because I enjoy life and as I get older I find no need to hurry up and get it done. I enjoy life with my daughter and I don't want things to rush past me in a blur. I wake up and leave my house during the work week in enough time to go shopping and have a sit down breakfast before I arrive to work if I wanted to do those things. Well I do shop in the am sometime.. heehee
I notice the small things around me because I am paying attention. I appreciate the little things because I take time to appreciate them. Sometime I'm a goalie sometime I'm a winger. I like to plan certain things those are my goalie tendencies however, there are instances I like to leave things adjustable and adaptable and that's where the winger part of me comes out. Are they good traits? These traits work for me right now I'm a recovering planner. I am more adaptable and plan more effectively. My plans are subjective so when necessary I will plan.
This weekend I’m planning on staying out of trouble. Maybe I will share next week if things went according to plan. The operative word being maybe... but did you just notice that I did plan? When necessary plan!
re·lax
–verb (used with object)
1.to make less tense, rigid, or firm; make lax
2.to become less tense, rigid, or firm.
3.to become less strict or severe; grow milder.
4.to reduce or stop work, effort, application, etc., esp. for the sake of rest or recreation
Thursday, January 17, 2008
WHAT STIMULATES YOU?
Recently, I've been in overdrive as far as stimuli go. There are thoughts roaming around in my head, visions and flashbacks that are scandalous yet oddly sweet.
I think I operate on certain stimuli most times. I'm more on top of my every day goings on when I am being appropriately stimulated. I am not necessarily speaking about anything physical or sexual but overall stimuli.
I enjoy mental foreplay. I admire someone that has a range of conversation. What I'm up to or what you are up to is good conversation for about five minutes, unless you have done some traveling or something fun. I’m not saying that type of conversation isn’t interesting; I’m saying variety is good as well.
While being updated on current affairs of my life might be interesting to some. I live it and well I am not that exciting for daily updates. I like to tell my story from the end when I'm done if at all. My process is exactly that my process and I'm comfortable going thru and over it on a solo level most times. Maybe that is a martyr-like attitude to have but I also have my go to and I don't think any person can top him.
There are a lot more interesting people, places and things in the world going on. There are things that I am passionate about, such as current events, the current Presidential election and books that you or I may have currently read that stir conversation. I read a lot of books and magazines that are fun, informative and educational. I would like to think that I am a plethora of useless information sometime, some where down the line of my life I have used that trivial knowledge as a base or reference in conversation.
I'm a people watcher not to be mistaken for a person that judges another. I am by nature an individual that has an interest in the study of the mind. I have studied phsychology since I was eight years old. The why of things not really what because once you figure out the why then what for me is a no brainier at this point of my thinking.
I've been told I am "mysterious". I don't see the mystery, I'm just me. I'm an open book if or when I begin to trust you. Which means if I trust you I feel comfortable telling you my stuff, my why and my what. Which in affect of it all I am then effectively stimulated by comfort and trust.
I have a close friend that I love dearly. She is closer to me then any one I know. As a friend she has allowed me to feel safe and comfortable without judgment. She is my go to person of the flesh. We balance one another in our friendship; I can rely on her honesty with no chaser and without being offended and in turn I hope I have the same effect on her as a friend.
I can depend on her with my dumb stuff. Dumb stuff is the stuff you think but would never say out loud because someone else may "think" and "analyze" what you said or didn't say when there really is nothing. Which is the reason I say "without judgment".
How we got to this level of friendship I have no idea I feel like it was natural of us to mesh like one individual instead of two separate whatever it was that got us here we yoke nicely. I feel like we are sisters with two different sets of parents. *teehee* Real friends are hard to find if you find one at all.
I have another friend that I love and we are in the making of a similar friendship. Our friendship is moving its course differently but I know we'll get to that place of equal trust one day. I'm not pushing it I just know that one day we will have that balance.
These two people stimulate me as people. Both for different reasons and in different ways at times but I think that separately we have the same zest and passion about certain things in life.
Anyway enough about what’s sweet about them this is about me. We know that I am currently not stimulated at work (if you read the previous blog you would know). Well the scandalous stuff are secrets that have been thrown in the closet with the rest of the skeletons buried deep in the recesses of my mind to be taken over one day by dementia…lol.
When I’ve decided to age I’ll one day throw out random words and sentences that will turn red the face of any person nearest to me. “Grammy has been watching those dirty movies again”, I can hear it now somewhere in the distance from my grandkids. The truth is unbeknownst to them it will have been “real talk”.
I have a passion for music as well, not the artist. The beat behind the lyrics is my love for music, which is why I have an acquired taste for instrumental jazz and a love for R&B and hip-hop. When I hear a good beat I get lost in the vibration. I only tune into the words if I feel the beat has captured me and catapulted me into a zone of worthiness. But, gospel music is for my soul, my healing and cleansing of unwanted stimuli and hyperactive emotions and thoughts. Gospel music to me is what brillo pad is to a soiled or burned pot. Scrape off the surface and get it shiny again until next time.
You shouldn't listen to sad love songs, or rap music about guns and body parts all the time. It’s fun when I’m on the road driving or sometime we have our cleaning music on Saturday mornings. But when all that is over what is left in your mind will come up and out. Why? Stimulation and mediation… I mentioned yesterday about the mind meditating on certain things.
It may be good music but if you are knee deep in sad music eventually you too will become sad, lonely or both! Sad music is fine if used as healing music but you have to move on from it until you are able to appreciate the sadness and quality of the words for just another good song.
This is the reason that jazz may be effective when you are sad, there are sad beats in instrumental jazz. With jazz you create your own words and emotions but jazz won’t keep you sad. Instrumental jazz pushes you forward with an upward beat to take you out of the tailspin created in your mind.
In my humble opinion you definitely can and will not go wrong with gospel music there is nothing more uplifting then listening to music about your higher power. No matter what the words in the song you know they are about something and someone of good. You can't help but feel good in the end of listening to gospel. It can be succesfully used as a subliminal message of the things are around you that are wonderful.
Why are stimuli on my mind today? I was stimulated today by a conversation or mental foreplay. There is power in and behind your thoughts. Thoughts are very stimulating so I remind you to proceed with caution.
stim·u·late
noun
1. the act of arousing an organism to action
2. any stimulating information or event; acts to arouse action
3. (physiology) the effect of a stimulus (on nerves or organs etc.)
4. mutual sexual fondling prior to sexual intercourse [syn: foreplay]
I think I operate on certain stimuli most times. I'm more on top of my every day goings on when I am being appropriately stimulated. I am not necessarily speaking about anything physical or sexual but overall stimuli.
I enjoy mental foreplay. I admire someone that has a range of conversation. What I'm up to or what you are up to is good conversation for about five minutes, unless you have done some traveling or something fun. I’m not saying that type of conversation isn’t interesting; I’m saying variety is good as well.
While being updated on current affairs of my life might be interesting to some. I live it and well I am not that exciting for daily updates. I like to tell my story from the end when I'm done if at all. My process is exactly that my process and I'm comfortable going thru and over it on a solo level most times. Maybe that is a martyr-like attitude to have but I also have my go to and I don't think any person can top him.
There are a lot more interesting people, places and things in the world going on. There are things that I am passionate about, such as current events, the current Presidential election and books that you or I may have currently read that stir conversation. I read a lot of books and magazines that are fun, informative and educational. I would like to think that I am a plethora of useless information sometime, some where down the line of my life I have used that trivial knowledge as a base or reference in conversation.
I'm a people watcher not to be mistaken for a person that judges another. I am by nature an individual that has an interest in the study of the mind. I have studied phsychology since I was eight years old. The why of things not really what because once you figure out the why then what for me is a no brainier at this point of my thinking.
I've been told I am "mysterious". I don't see the mystery, I'm just me. I'm an open book if or when I begin to trust you. Which means if I trust you I feel comfortable telling you my stuff, my why and my what. Which in affect of it all I am then effectively stimulated by comfort and trust.
I have a close friend that I love dearly. She is closer to me then any one I know. As a friend she has allowed me to feel safe and comfortable without judgment. She is my go to person of the flesh. We balance one another in our friendship; I can rely on her honesty with no chaser and without being offended and in turn I hope I have the same effect on her as a friend.
I can depend on her with my dumb stuff. Dumb stuff is the stuff you think but would never say out loud because someone else may "think" and "analyze" what you said or didn't say when there really is nothing. Which is the reason I say "without judgment".
How we got to this level of friendship I have no idea I feel like it was natural of us to mesh like one individual instead of two separate whatever it was that got us here we yoke nicely. I feel like we are sisters with two different sets of parents. *teehee* Real friends are hard to find if you find one at all.
I have another friend that I love and we are in the making of a similar friendship. Our friendship is moving its course differently but I know we'll get to that place of equal trust one day. I'm not pushing it I just know that one day we will have that balance.
These two people stimulate me as people. Both for different reasons and in different ways at times but I think that separately we have the same zest and passion about certain things in life.
Anyway enough about what’s sweet about them this is about me. We know that I am currently not stimulated at work (if you read the previous blog you would know). Well the scandalous stuff are secrets that have been thrown in the closet with the rest of the skeletons buried deep in the recesses of my mind to be taken over one day by dementia…lol.
When I’ve decided to age I’ll one day throw out random words and sentences that will turn red the face of any person nearest to me. “Grammy has been watching those dirty movies again”, I can hear it now somewhere in the distance from my grandkids. The truth is unbeknownst to them it will have been “real talk”.
I have a passion for music as well, not the artist. The beat behind the lyrics is my love for music, which is why I have an acquired taste for instrumental jazz and a love for R&B and hip-hop. When I hear a good beat I get lost in the vibration. I only tune into the words if I feel the beat has captured me and catapulted me into a zone of worthiness. But, gospel music is for my soul, my healing and cleansing of unwanted stimuli and hyperactive emotions and thoughts. Gospel music to me is what brillo pad is to a soiled or burned pot. Scrape off the surface and get it shiny again until next time.
You shouldn't listen to sad love songs, or rap music about guns and body parts all the time. It’s fun when I’m on the road driving or sometime we have our cleaning music on Saturday mornings. But when all that is over what is left in your mind will come up and out. Why? Stimulation and mediation… I mentioned yesterday about the mind meditating on certain things.
It may be good music but if you are knee deep in sad music eventually you too will become sad, lonely or both! Sad music is fine if used as healing music but you have to move on from it until you are able to appreciate the sadness and quality of the words for just another good song.
This is the reason that jazz may be effective when you are sad, there are sad beats in instrumental jazz. With jazz you create your own words and emotions but jazz won’t keep you sad. Instrumental jazz pushes you forward with an upward beat to take you out of the tailspin created in your mind.
In my humble opinion you definitely can and will not go wrong with gospel music there is nothing more uplifting then listening to music about your higher power. No matter what the words in the song you know they are about something and someone of good. You can't help but feel good in the end of listening to gospel. It can be succesfully used as a subliminal message of the things are around you that are wonderful.
Why are stimuli on my mind today? I was stimulated today by a conversation or mental foreplay. There is power in and behind your thoughts. Thoughts are very stimulating so I remind you to proceed with caution.
stim·u·late
noun
1. the act of arousing an organism to action
2. any stimulating information or event; acts to arouse action
3. (physiology) the effect of a stimulus (on nerves or organs etc.)
4. mutual sexual fondling prior to sexual intercourse [syn: foreplay]
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Affect vs. Effect
Today I woke up refreshed, revitalized and rested. It is amazing what a good night's sleep and rest does for the mind and body. I am not what you call a well-rested person, I wake up in the middle of the night several times just to look at the clock and realize I had only been asleep for an hour past the last time I checked the clock. Why? I have no concrete reason as to why but I have my guesses.
I grab on to sleep when I can, I've noticed that I am taking naps. I like to call them power naps. I wake up emotionally cleansed. I don't believe I had taken a nap since I was an infant. I do know that it feels good to feel rested. There is a difference between sleep and rest and I think I am finally getting the hang of doing both at night at the same time.
Anyway, in my last blog I was discussing my job and today is my official "probationary period over day". I don't feel any different; there were no horns or confetti. However, one of my bosses who is in a high level position received a call today from his girlfriend. I've done personal things for my boss that have involved purchases or the planning of an event for his girlfriend.
However,the time I have been here this is the first I've answered a call from her so essentially this is the first I've heard her voice.
So I answer the phone and let her know that he is in a meeting. I'll call her Maya; Maya asks if this is Champagne (not my real name) I respond, yes it is Maya. She proceeds to thank me for taking care of "my boss" during the day and he speaks very highly of me, he said, "I am the most professional person he has ever had as an Assistant and I have a great attitude". "She looks forward to and can't wait to meet me in person." She said more but I won't break my arm patting myself on the back. *smile*
I told her I appreciated her letting me know that. She mentioned how he appreciates me and he speaks of me often. I thanked her again. I was mildly embarrassed because I don't take compliments well; but those are my issues. I took the compliments and kind words and added them to how great I have been feeling lately.
I feel a breakthrough coming on and that my life is about to accelerate upward. When you feel good you look good. I feel great and when you feel great you attract different types of people. I don't mean that in a physical way however true that is as well. I mean it's the "Law of Attraction" what you feel and meditate on in your mind will exude outward even if you try to conceal it.
It will show in the type of people you meet, in the everyday things that happen in your life. It will show in the people that want to be in your presence as well.It's that small faith or hope that things will get better which if goes un-concealed around the right person it will take over and you will have attracted a small piece of happy; which eventually leads to a larger piece and so forth. Most successes have been built on failure, it's the persistant struggle AGAINST discouragement. One fails forward to success with persistance.
It doesn't matter what is going on in your life. If you worry on it too much and over plan for the future you can't get the answers that you need for the right now.
I don't want to leave behind a legacy of "oh she had so many plans" I want people to remember what I had done in the now, what I am doing. (Note to self: take a damn vacation) Think about it this way, have you ever been to a funeral and the funeral director asks if "anyone has anything to say" but no one steps up. Then there is that one person that is bold enough to get up because he was the person in the room that was more embarrassed then any of the rest to take a step on faith and say something nice about the deceased. He gets up and pulls whatever memory out of a hat usually nothing too spectacular. Why is that? Is it because the deceased didn't have a real impact on anyone?
There is nothing wrong with being average as long as YOU are happy! IF that is the only thing that someone can say about you then that is fine as well. "She was happy, I never saw her without a smile" that statement right there would prompt more then a few melancholy chuckles of "that's true".
The other perspective is the one who has a line of people waiting to say something about the deceased. The loss is greater then the reality that they are not of the flesh anymore. While living that person had an affect on those around them and those whom they came in contact. The effect of the loss is so great that people want it to be known how touched they were.
The appreciators of your presence will be forever present in the mind and hearts of those you knew. Your footprints on someone elses heart I guess.
We can have all the material things in life and still not be happy, we can have nothing at all and people will look in wonder and amazement and question what it is that person has going on to be happy about?
I'm not saying worry about what people are thinking; who cares?! I'm saying, pray, live and love from within and it will exude outward. You never know who is watching or what people are thinking.
We all love compliments it's human. No matter what your circumstances we all have stuff going on sometime. But if you can make one impression make it a good one and in return it will come back to you; maybe in the form of a compliment.
Remember, there is always someone doing worse then you, feeling worse then you, so just when you think you have problems look around you. You never know what anyone is thinking or feeling for that fact. But the affect of your mood has an impact effective to others around you be it stranger or someone you are familiar.
af·fect
–verb (used with object)
1. to act on; produce an effect or change in
2. to impress the mind or move the feelings of
ef·fect
–noun
1. power to produce results; efficacy; force; validity; influence
2. meaning or sense; purpose or intention
3. a mental or emotional impression produced
I grab on to sleep when I can, I've noticed that I am taking naps. I like to call them power naps. I wake up emotionally cleansed. I don't believe I had taken a nap since I was an infant. I do know that it feels good to feel rested. There is a difference between sleep and rest and I think I am finally getting the hang of doing both at night at the same time.
Anyway, in my last blog I was discussing my job and today is my official "probationary period over day". I don't feel any different; there were no horns or confetti. However, one of my bosses who is in a high level position received a call today from his girlfriend. I've done personal things for my boss that have involved purchases or the planning of an event for his girlfriend.
However,the time I have been here this is the first I've answered a call from her so essentially this is the first I've heard her voice.
So I answer the phone and let her know that he is in a meeting. I'll call her Maya; Maya asks if this is Champagne (not my real name) I respond, yes it is Maya. She proceeds to thank me for taking care of "my boss" during the day and he speaks very highly of me, he said, "I am the most professional person he has ever had as an Assistant and I have a great attitude". "She looks forward to and can't wait to meet me in person." She said more but I won't break my arm patting myself on the back. *smile*
I told her I appreciated her letting me know that. She mentioned how he appreciates me and he speaks of me often. I thanked her again. I was mildly embarrassed because I don't take compliments well; but those are my issues. I took the compliments and kind words and added them to how great I have been feeling lately.
I feel a breakthrough coming on and that my life is about to accelerate upward. When you feel good you look good. I feel great and when you feel great you attract different types of people. I don't mean that in a physical way however true that is as well. I mean it's the "Law of Attraction" what you feel and meditate on in your mind will exude outward even if you try to conceal it.
It will show in the type of people you meet, in the everyday things that happen in your life. It will show in the people that want to be in your presence as well.It's that small faith or hope that things will get better which if goes un-concealed around the right person it will take over and you will have attracted a small piece of happy; which eventually leads to a larger piece and so forth. Most successes have been built on failure, it's the persistant struggle AGAINST discouragement. One fails forward to success with persistance.
It doesn't matter what is going on in your life. If you worry on it too much and over plan for the future you can't get the answers that you need for the right now.
I don't want to leave behind a legacy of "oh she had so many plans" I want people to remember what I had done in the now, what I am doing. (Note to self: take a damn vacation) Think about it this way, have you ever been to a funeral and the funeral director asks if "anyone has anything to say" but no one steps up. Then there is that one person that is bold enough to get up because he was the person in the room that was more embarrassed then any of the rest to take a step on faith and say something nice about the deceased. He gets up and pulls whatever memory out of a hat usually nothing too spectacular. Why is that? Is it because the deceased didn't have a real impact on anyone?
There is nothing wrong with being average as long as YOU are happy! IF that is the only thing that someone can say about you then that is fine as well. "She was happy, I never saw her without a smile" that statement right there would prompt more then a few melancholy chuckles of "that's true".
The other perspective is the one who has a line of people waiting to say something about the deceased. The loss is greater then the reality that they are not of the flesh anymore. While living that person had an affect on those around them and those whom they came in contact. The effect of the loss is so great that people want it to be known how touched they were.
The appreciators of your presence will be forever present in the mind and hearts of those you knew. Your footprints on someone elses heart I guess.
We can have all the material things in life and still not be happy, we can have nothing at all and people will look in wonder and amazement and question what it is that person has going on to be happy about?
I'm not saying worry about what people are thinking; who cares?! I'm saying, pray, live and love from within and it will exude outward. You never know who is watching or what people are thinking.
We all love compliments it's human. No matter what your circumstances we all have stuff going on sometime. But if you can make one impression make it a good one and in return it will come back to you; maybe in the form of a compliment.
Remember, there is always someone doing worse then you, feeling worse then you, so just when you think you have problems look around you. You never know what anyone is thinking or feeling for that fact. But the affect of your mood has an impact effective to others around you be it stranger or someone you are familiar.
af·fect
–verb (used with object)
1. to act on; produce an effect or change in
2. to impress the mind or move the feelings of
ef·fect
–noun
1. power to produce results; efficacy; force; validity; influence
2. meaning or sense; purpose or intention
3. a mental or emotional impression produced
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
The Tale of More Money More Work
I began my first blog in August 2007. I believe that was the last time I blogged as well. I'm off to a new start and I'm going to give this blogging thing another try for 2008.
I enjoy reading other writers' blogs. I find reading blogs to be very interesting and I also find myself thinking, hey I thought of that why didn't I also write about it? I have so much time on my hands now with my new job and all.
I interviewed and was hired by this company three months to the day tomorrow. This has been a long three months. I know you are probably thinking I was busy learning new things and becoming familiar with the organization, however this is not the case.
I can honestly say I make decent money but of course we always want and feel we deserve more money. I am a frustrated Executive Admin Assistant. I am not frustrated because I am an Admin, I am frustrated because I have no work. A normal day here at the office is to come in eat breakfast, check my work email (because we can't check outside email) and sit and stare at the computer for the rest of the day.
I'm almost certain you are thinking "why don't you ask for work"? Well, if I do that then there is a big possibility I will upset more then a few other Admin's. I ask for things to do from the "team" I support, however, I don't want busy work.
I want to be productive. I have talent and skill that are not being utilized, which is something that was important enough for me to mention during the interview before accepting the position. I guess it wasn't equally as important for him to mention that my skills and talent wouldn't pertain to this job anymore then they did at my last position with another company.
I would love to feel like I've accomplished something at the end of my day. It wouldn't be necessary to be busy all of the time, but four days max out of a five day work week would be good. It's funny one of the guys I support told me that this position was between me and another candidate.
I believe the other candidate at the time was the one that was going to be hired until she became a stalker. She began calling them everyday. I thought I was lucky to get this position I think she turned out to be the lucky one.
I spend my day eating, an attempt at healthy of course and checking different websites to find a new place to call home.
I never want to be too comfortable with a salary and a paycheck to say I don't desire more money. More money more work. That statement isn't necessarily a true statement. I would however take a chance again on "more money". I'm considering looking for a new position as I type. I'm not a job hopper so it's hard for me to grasp going thru the interview process in such a short period of time.
Do I feel secure in this job? I most certainly do. I was clever enough to do my research before considering taking the offer and I was also savvy enough to ask during the interview process. This company hasn't had any layoffs in over 10yrs. Why? It's an internationally based company with secure financials. I'm not saying that layoff can't happen what I am saying is my chances are better here then with any other company for the moment. I'm still disposable. I'm not comfortable but then again I don't want to be, when you reach a certain comfort level you never desire to do any more then what you are comfortable with. I'm sure that will make sense to some.
I take home more money but I definately don't earn it the way one normally should earn a paycheck. A normal day for me is to eat breakfast, check my work email and if I'm lucky I will get to do expenses for one of the people I support.
A friend of mine says "I never heard of anyone complain about not having any work". I guess to some I shouldn't complain but to those of us that don't mind hard work it would be a problem, at the very least it would be frustrating.
I find it's frustrating to sit in mediocrity. I would like to feel validated at work when I am working. When I am not working I don't need validation my job doesn't validate who I am as a person, it's what I do not who I am.
Another example is when I am at home being a Mom, I know I'm a mom and I know I'm doing my own best job thru faith and love, I feel validated because my daughter is getting good grades, she is a good 'tween thus far..lol.. she is respectful and smart. That feels good, I feel validated.
When I put myself to task I have my own expectations of excellence and I don't worry about what other people think. I'm hard enough on myself, so who cares what anyone else thinks about me.
I am willing to take other suggestions, but right now in my spare time here I will improve my writing skills by writing every day for at least an hour. Writing is important to me. Words are important to me. They have affect and effect on others.
I actually have one hour to write here and one hour to work my other writing. I can commit to two hours because I have that much time. I am also considering brushing up on my Spanish, that might be a little difficult to do here. I think I should at least attain a good understanding for the English language first. We shall see.
Until next time......
mind (mnd)n.
1. The human consciousness that originates in the brain and is manifested especially in thought, perception, emotion, will, memory, and imagination.
2. The principle of intelligence; the spirit of consciousness regarded as an aspect of reality.
3. The faculty of thinking, reasoning, and applying knowledge: Follow your mind, not your heart.
4. A person of great mental ability
I enjoy reading other writers' blogs. I find reading blogs to be very interesting and I also find myself thinking, hey I thought of that why didn't I also write about it? I have so much time on my hands now with my new job and all.
I interviewed and was hired by this company three months to the day tomorrow. This has been a long three months. I know you are probably thinking I was busy learning new things and becoming familiar with the organization, however this is not the case.
I can honestly say I make decent money but of course we always want and feel we deserve more money. I am a frustrated Executive Admin Assistant. I am not frustrated because I am an Admin, I am frustrated because I have no work. A normal day here at the office is to come in eat breakfast, check my work email (because we can't check outside email) and sit and stare at the computer for the rest of the day.
I'm almost certain you are thinking "why don't you ask for work"? Well, if I do that then there is a big possibility I will upset more then a few other Admin's. I ask for things to do from the "team" I support, however, I don't want busy work.
I want to be productive. I have talent and skill that are not being utilized, which is something that was important enough for me to mention during the interview before accepting the position. I guess it wasn't equally as important for him to mention that my skills and talent wouldn't pertain to this job anymore then they did at my last position with another company.
I would love to feel like I've accomplished something at the end of my day. It wouldn't be necessary to be busy all of the time, but four days max out of a five day work week would be good. It's funny one of the guys I support told me that this position was between me and another candidate.
I believe the other candidate at the time was the one that was going to be hired until she became a stalker. She began calling them everyday. I thought I was lucky to get this position I think she turned out to be the lucky one.
I spend my day eating, an attempt at healthy of course and checking different websites to find a new place to call home.
I never want to be too comfortable with a salary and a paycheck to say I don't desire more money. More money more work. That statement isn't necessarily a true statement. I would however take a chance again on "more money". I'm considering looking for a new position as I type. I'm not a job hopper so it's hard for me to grasp going thru the interview process in such a short period of time.
Do I feel secure in this job? I most certainly do. I was clever enough to do my research before considering taking the offer and I was also savvy enough to ask during the interview process. This company hasn't had any layoffs in over 10yrs. Why? It's an internationally based company with secure financials. I'm not saying that layoff can't happen what I am saying is my chances are better here then with any other company for the moment. I'm still disposable. I'm not comfortable but then again I don't want to be, when you reach a certain comfort level you never desire to do any more then what you are comfortable with. I'm sure that will make sense to some.
I take home more money but I definately don't earn it the way one normally should earn a paycheck. A normal day for me is to eat breakfast, check my work email and if I'm lucky I will get to do expenses for one of the people I support.
A friend of mine says "I never heard of anyone complain about not having any work". I guess to some I shouldn't complain but to those of us that don't mind hard work it would be a problem, at the very least it would be frustrating.
I find it's frustrating to sit in mediocrity. I would like to feel validated at work when I am working. When I am not working I don't need validation my job doesn't validate who I am as a person, it's what I do not who I am.
Another example is when I am at home being a Mom, I know I'm a mom and I know I'm doing my own best job thru faith and love, I feel validated because my daughter is getting good grades, she is a good 'tween thus far..lol.. she is respectful and smart. That feels good, I feel validated.
When I put myself to task I have my own expectations of excellence and I don't worry about what other people think. I'm hard enough on myself, so who cares what anyone else thinks about me.
I am willing to take other suggestions, but right now in my spare time here I will improve my writing skills by writing every day for at least an hour. Writing is important to me. Words are important to me. They have affect and effect on others.
I actually have one hour to write here and one hour to work my other writing. I can commit to two hours because I have that much time. I am also considering brushing up on my Spanish, that might be a little difficult to do here. I think I should at least attain a good understanding for the English language first. We shall see.
Until next time......
mind (mnd)n.
1. The human consciousness that originates in the brain and is manifested especially in thought, perception, emotion, will, memory, and imagination.
2. The principle of intelligence; the spirit of consciousness regarded as an aspect of reality.
3. The faculty of thinking, reasoning, and applying knowledge: Follow your mind, not your heart.
4. A person of great mental ability
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